Silver Vistas Retirement Community USA
Retirement Humor




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some extracts from the Administrator's Diary
 
Saturday, 31 December

Today, we had a visit from the Police. It seems Mr and Mrs Cobstanding have been growing marijuana in their spare room, with seeds they brought back from Amsterdam, in Holland. They have been using it to make up a herbal drink, which actually they have given me bottles of, and which I always found quite palatable, and a good way to relax. Anyway, it seems that what they are doing is illegal, even though they have not smoked any. The Police aren't going to prosecute, but they have told them not to do it again. Some of their regular visitors from the Young Offenders Hostel will be disappointed, as I gather that they always enjoyed a glass or two of the drink.
Thursday, 5 January

A very sad day. Mrs Lamburger has unexpectedly passed away as a result of a heart attack. The doctor says it could have been stress, but really, what sort of stress could she have had? Happily, the funeral was well attended, and I do believe I may have recruited one or two people to come to live with us in Silver Vistas.
Sunday, 8 January

Today's Village Meeting was fairly routine, but we did have an interesting speaker, Mr Sconepole, whose subject was 'arachnids'. Not everyone had realised this would be about spiders, and not everyone was pleased when he brought out a live tarantula and some poisonous Australian spiders. Mrs Crapfilter was brave enough to handle one of these! So, overall it was judged as a good evening.
Thursday, 12 January

Rain again today. We have a leak in the roof of the communal area, with a portable commode catching the drips, but unfortunately it has overflowed. I'll have to chase up head office for the approval on fixing the leak.
Thursday, 19 January

I've been having trouble keeping the financial records up to date, although I believe Silver Vistas is in good financial health. However, all is now in hand. Mr Grabwallis has kindly offered to look after all this for me. It is a great relief to know our finances are in competent hands. I offered him payment, but he refused. We are lucky to have such people in our community.
 



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