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Some Services Available to Residents
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On-site Hairdresser
The hairdresser will be on site every weekday afternoon. Mondays Men, other days Ladies.
Appointments recommended, but usually can accommodate walk-ins.
Ladies Prices: Cut and blow dry £5; Blue rinse £10; Perm £20
Men's Prices: Trim £5; Wax bald spot £10; Condom £1
Free coffee served! | Great Exit Funeral Service
Great Exit Funeral Service has a well-earned reputation for its attention to
detail in organising funeral arrangements.
Last year's loss of a coffin (with occupant)
was overblown in the local newspaper, and in any case the coffin was soon found again.
So if you want a nice funeral, cheaper than the Coop, do please consider us.
Residents entitled to 20% discount! | Slick & Associates - Financial Advisors
Slick & Associates can provide all the services you would expect of an Independent Financial
Advisor (IFA). We can lend you money at attractive rates (our interest rate is only 10%*). We can look
after your precious savings too, by investing in a range of safe securities, like the Lehman Guaranteed Bond.
Contrary to what you may read in the press, Mr Slick has not absconded with any funds, and in any case,
we are sure he has just borrowed them temporarily; we are sure it will be all cleared up when he gets back
in contact from Panama.
* rates are per month | Pharmacy & Therapy
The Pharmacy is open every weekday from 10am to noon, and therapy sessions are available in the afternoons.
We offer very competitive prices for your medications and for our therapy sessions. We are proud to be affiliated
to the Institute of Geriatric Beauty and Medication.
Some prices: Aspirin £5 per 1000, Insulin shot £20, Viagra £3,
Assorted pills £8 per 100.
We can even get you discounted rates on plastic surgery! |
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On a serious note, if you enjoy this fun website, do please consider purchases
from the ads
below and on the right, or our Amazon Shop, to help keep the website going!
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